My Daddy's a King

There is no one like "Mom"

And I have the benefit of having two!

I struggle with my natural mom, Janet. I feel as though there are times I do not know or understand her. She's been in the background of my life for most of my life. I lived with and was raised by my dad and step-mom, David and Donna.

I grew up calling both women "Mom" and so that causes great confusion for people sometimes. But there is still no one quite like "Mom". She's the one who stayed up all night with me when I was sick. She's the one who grieved when she was told I wouldn't live through the night when I was on life support from spinal meningitis. That was my step-mom, Donna. She holds a special part of my heart.

It amazes me how the Lord worked this whole thing of adoption. That one could love someone like they are their flesh and blood when they are not is a mystery to me, and yet its the perfect example of Christ's love for me -- for us! No obligation, and yet -- love! He calls me his own. Mom calls me her own.

What precipitated all this thought? I got an email from my mom. I finally got her work email and as such, got direct contact with her. Her husband monitors the email at home and so I don't get personal emails from her at home. But she emailed me and I smiled and felt warm and fuzzy inside when I got it. In it she told me she wanted me to come for Thanksgiving, that it would be great to have me home. I felt loved and wanted.

It is such a lie to the enemy that removes that same feeling from us of the Lord. He loves me and wants me! But the thought that came in when I started to think of my Thanksgiving plans is "where would I go?" Other singles are already invited to families' homes for the holiday. I became very insecure and began to feel unwanted. And then mom's email came, telling me I was more than welcome. Can I just say that I am so intensely amazed at how the Lord has just now showed me how this happens with me and the Lord!! The orphan spirit comes in and says that I am not wanted. Jesus, my Daddy, comes in and says, "I desire you! I want you to come home!"

Oh Lord, I miss you so much. I didn't realize until now how far I've turned from you. Any distance from you is too much! I say to you, orphan spirit, that you have no place here. I have my place -- with my Daddy -- and it is secure! No longer do I choose to wander, but I am coming home.

posted by imallforgod @ 6:52 PM